The positives of aging and the liberating feeling of gifting something to yourself

I have always enjoyed celebrating my birthday. However, I have hated the aging process. The responsibilities to come dawned on me when I turned 15.

That moment symbolized for me the transition of going from being a girl to a young woman. And I was very aware of the responsibilities that came with being an adult woman.

I just didn’t want to deal with them. Like finishing college, moving out of my parents house, finding a job, paying bills, etc. I was aware that adulthood had a “to do”list that seemed so overwhelmingly tiresome and predictable. At least thats what I thought.

So in celebration of turning the big 3-6, I wanted to write about the new found positives of aging and the liberating feeling of gifting something to yourself on your special day.

Positive #1

Confidence. Confidence in areas that as a teen and even possibly going in to your 20’s, some people struggle with and that is knowing who you are as a person. Not needing validation from others as means to feel better about yourself. Being accepting of you. Knowing no matter what season of life that you are in, that you are special and a work in progress until your last day.

Understanding that you matter and God designed you with a purpose. This knowledge gives me confidence!

Positive #2

Focus on Current Provision.

And what I mean by current provision is, what I have now that I did not have before or never thought I’d would have at 36.

I have been abundantly blessed. It seems that the area of patience has always been the spot that God has worked on me.

It seemed like I had to wait an eternity to meet my husband. Another long wait was being able to get pregnant. It took us about 6 years to get pregnant.

So looking at what I have now, being married to a wonderful and loving husband. Being the mother of 2 beautiful boys. It sure allows me to be grateful to my now and what God has gifted to me thus far. My focus is no longer a juvenile focus on what others have that I do not have. My focus has shifted to living in the present and enjoying what I have.

Positive #3

Awareness. Im more aware of what builds me up and brings me down. Because of this awareness, plus the confidence that I mentioned earlier, I am better able to make decisions.

I told my sister on my birthday, “this year I am gifting myself RESPECT.” She laughed, I laughed and then I elaborated on it.

Remember I mentioned the liberating feeling of gifting yourself something on your special day? Well, for me it is respect.

As an example I will share what I told my sister. It baffles me, that I have friends and relatives who actively look at my social media accounts and maybe 2 years or more go by and they cannot bring themselves to say, “hi, how have you been?” or give a thumbs up or any sign of life, yet they continue on snooping on my things like I cannot see who’s looking at my stuff?

No well wishes, nothing. So what’s the point then? And Im over on the other side waiting for a reply, a hello, anything… Fuming because another post, another year goes by and you still looking at my stuff, staying quiet like we do not know each other in person. And then I realized, I have control over this. That’s not that person’s fault I feel this way. Heck, they have no clue I feel this way. Not only that. Do you know how much this feeling of anger stunts you as a person? It does! a whole lot. It stunts your spiritual growth as well. It stunts your love towards that person. New feelings begin to pester you that are negative. It is all around not good. So out of respect and love towards that person and yourself its best to cut ties. Move on. You don’t need to keep tabs on them and they certainly do not need to keep tabs on you.

It only took me 36 years to figure that one out, lol. But hey, Im a work in progress.

So cheers to another year. Cheers to wisdom and cheers to God for opening my eyes to the positives of aging.

Until next time! -the stay at home rookie